I've been reflecting on an incident that happened this past weekend and I can't help but post about it since it's (somewhat) related to this class. This past Saturday night, my ride home after work was delayed. So, I began to walk home. (As some context, our football team had a home game occurring at the same time). While beginning to walk through campus, I noticed that a couple was fighting loudly at the bottom of a hill by a building. (I assume that they had been drinking, but I don't know) Seeing the girl walking after the guy and him kind-of pushing her away, I decided to hang out to make sure that everything was fine. They moved under a bridge and I was unable to see them (but I could still hear them). I walked to the other side of the bridge and saw them come out. She was still chasing after him and he was still tossing her hand off or pushing her away. At this point, I became concerned. After everything that we have been discussing in class, I was worried for this young woman. Then, they walked into the dark shadows of the building. At this point, I was worried that this fight could escalate (dark shadows hide dark secrets). So, I hurried down to where I knew some security guards would be to let them know about the couple. When we arrived back, the young man had his hands around the girl (on the tree) with her pinned to a tree. She pushed against him and he used his chest to push her back. The guy, probably noticing the cops observing them, let her off the tree and then they spoke a few minutes and left with his girlfriend putting her arm through his. The cops said they didn't see anything so they let them go.
Some thoughts: The cops did have a point, in a away. The guy wasn't physically assaulting her. That is, I don't think that a guy throwing a girl's hand off of him would be considered assault (or would it?). Perhaps my fears did misinterpret what was going on. BUT I can't help but feel like I did the right thing. Perhaps by them seeing the cops, the fight de-escalated from something that would have been more physical. And that is what makes it worth it. Of course, I ask myself why didn't I act sooner, did I over re-act, was there a bigger issue than I thought there was...
Yet, I am most disheartened by something else. No one else that was walking by (there were MANY people) cared about what was going on. It seemed there was no awareness of their surroundings. The couple could be heard fighting over the noise of everyone walking by, yet no one stopped or glanced towards the couple fighting. Would they stop if there was an assault happening? Would they help someone out?
Would those that were walking past the couple I saw fighting do the same? Would I have engaged the couple if necessary?
This had me thinking about the two Swede men that helped out the target in the Brock Turner case. They engaged, helped, saved, a young woman. And, in this, they are to be admired.
I think the problem that people struggle with (me included) is whether to get involved. It's hard to know if something needs to be done. But this may be why there are problems with assault--people don't engage or ask if someone is alright or just walk on by...
I just hope that the young woman is alright.
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